Parenting

To all parents,
It occurred to me, while having my quiet time with the Lord, that as parents (especially moms) we are very much about ourselves. One would even dare to say we are pretty much about me-ism.  The doctrines or beliefs about me.  Why do I say that?  Let's take me for instance; it is my desire to raise godly children, I believe that children are a gift from God and are to be raised to bring Him glory.  That is according to His Word Ps. 78: 6,7; Prov. 20:7,to name a few. I believe that.  I have Bible study with the girls on mornings and we talk about the Lord and His Word. We talk about His standards for our lives.  We talk of His faithfulness, His grace and mercy.  We talk of His goodness, His great love for us, for mankind.  I say to them we can rest on God's promises, He will never leave us nor forsake us.  We discuss Ps. 139.  I say I trust the God who orchestrates my life, from the time I was  a figment of my mom's imagination until the end of my life on earth.  But do I really?  Am I truly careful to demonstrate that I believe that?  I have been known to say that I do not like people much, and that is true.  On my own, in my own strength, I just do not have the capacity to love unconditionally, as the Lord commands.  I have a very low opinion of human nature, and through out my life of observing and encountering various people, there is very little about people to change my opinion.  There, I have said it!!  Guess what people, The Bible says it too!  The heart of man is deceitful and wicked (Jer. 17:9).  WE are innately wicked, there is no good found in us.  That is why we need a Savior. I allow my past to, at time direct my future ( actions, attitudes toward people and circumstances).  Why?  Why do I do that, if I believe that the Lord is in charge of my life?  Why do I allow my past to dictate my relationship with others?  Why do I have twelve inch walls between myself and others?  Perhaps, because I do not trust the heart of my Lord as I say I do.  Do you?